there and back and there and back again

hi everyone,

I feel like this one will be short and sweet. Mostly because I’m about to move out of my house this weekend and we’re doing a big new launch at work and I have a happy hour to get to and too many things on my to do list that maybe a margarita will help ease the daunt I feel. Is daunt a word? Can you feel my chaos? Anywho… I have to go buy boxes and had to google where to buy boxes and soon will be putting 3 years of life lived in Austin into cardboard boxes that will live within another box which we call a storage unit which is everyone’s favorite Sunday activity. Especially in Texas’ August heat. (Shoutout to my Step-dad for his help on this one). As I write this, I can see the photo booth film strips standing up on my windowsill and I can’t help but get emotional. Emotional about all the frayed journals covered in my messy all caps handwriting from the last 10 years that will collect dust for the next little while. The tiny vases and cobalt blue glassware I recently bought and the crocs that I got in irony and ended up loving and now can’t wear in the summer because they make my feet sweat. I think about the wooden ladder I climb up every night and then down again because I have to pee and then up again to get into my little bed in my little loft. The billion cockroaches that just about give me a heart attack every time they fly when I try to kill them. The film negatives, propagated plants, clothes that I won’t see for a while, and letters i’ve saved from all of the people I love. All of which will be gone for a bit (emphasis on bit. I’m not leaving forever. At least not currently. I’ll be back and then gone and back and then gone again ok!!).

I read a line last night in the book i’m currently reading by Craig Taylor that said “Everyone is someone’s favorite artist.” I found my eyes circling back and back to that sentence. Isn’t that true though? Who are we to discredit someones art or words or life just because it’s not our “cup of tea”. Who are we to think we know the path someone should be on? The god they should believe or not believe in? The job they should take or turn down or quit? We don’t really know do we? Everyone has to follow the place that life is leading them to. The places their heart is telling them to explore and they don’t owe us an explanation. Everyone really is someone’s favorite artist and so are you.

[As per usual, I have been listening to the song “Glisten by the Wind” by Nick Leng, and ABBA, and the 2 hour rain loop that sings me to sleep every night. I’ve been admiring the light that hits the trees outside my house, and really wanting to help people achieve their dreams. Sounds cheesy but it’s true. Also…for those who keep wondering. I am not moving away from Austin forever. Well maybe eventually. Hopefully eventually. Just gonna spend some time on the east coast this fall. October-December to be exact. I’ll be back for Christmas and then maybe spend some time on the west coast and then back again and then away again and so on. I’m not leaving you officially all just yet but there won’t be a couch of my own that we can sit on and sip some sparkling wine I just bought and talk about our latest crushes. But I’ll be back and gone and back again. OK OK im done writing now. Thought this would be short but I guess not so much. As always… scroll down to see some film from my latest roll and let me know if you made it this far. That would be cool.]